Saturday, August 8, 2009 2:28 AM
have been working this few days and the first week really kills me. its was damn tiring cause i hardly wake up so early for work and my everyday routine was only filing. can really doze off when am alone in the room ha. finally its weekend and i doesnt to work liao! then ytd night went to meet Gary for movie at Jurong Point. watched Hang Over. i guess it gonna be the best comedy show i ever watch ba. but the triller isnt really tat funny so starting i din think of watching it till HE say it was nice. so we to watch and of cause it turn out to be a nice show =) after the show, went all the way from JP to JE.. i dunno how long the walking takes cause we were busy talking but we are sweating like mad. Wanted to find Him cause been 1 week plus i din see him i guess and turns out that its gonna be the last night. again, He's force to come down when he was damn tired after schooling and training. if He had nv know me... He will not be suffering all this nonsense from me. went over to Boon Lay to find Dar to have a talk. maybe should thanks Dar for dragging Him over ba ha. and Gary is flying off to Thailand today!! so its gonna be a small farewell party for him haha. so the last night end off with the same conclusion. He's just not gonna be mine. i nv knew i gonna love some1 so deeply ba. i just doesnt hv any mood for anything, anyone. if only i know the 3 nights are all i hv for my entire life, i will nv waste any sec but just watching u. if only i know its was first and last time we went to JP tgt, i will not show u atti and walk away. if i know how sad am i to part with u in train, i will chase after u and not watching ur back leaving. if only i know i cn see u longer, i can forsake any job just to be with u for a little longer. if only i knew u earlier....just dunno wat should i do now to numb all those misses, hurts, feelings. the best solution would be moving on but seems like i doesnt wan to find 1. i guess i will nv love some1 as much as Him. so the least i can do was to stay away from Him, not asking anything about Him, not contacting Him. maybe Gary is right... i should be dead heart by now. love isnt smth nice after all when u cant be with someone u really want. i just want to be alone....